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By David
- In Divorce Mediation
In spite of what we see in the movies, divorce does not have to be an ugly, drawn-out process that leaves both parties bitter and short of money. While some highly contested divorces inevitably have to be settled in the court system, many divorce settlements can be done via mediation. Not only is this a more cost-effective way of finalizing the divorce, it also takes less time and in most cases, leaves both parties feeling as if they have benefited.
What Is Divorce Mediation?
Just as marriage is a contract between two people, so is a divorce. Like any other contract, it comes with terms and conditions. In the absence of mediation, if the parties are unable to come to a mutual agreement, the terms and conditions are imposed by the court. This creates a risk of the couple ending up with a divorce settlement neither party is happy with.
Mediation exists as a way for the divorcing couple to work out the terms and conditions themselves, with the help of a mediation specialist. It tends to be less combative than a courtroom setting because the parties are working together instead of going in on opposing sides. Couples are given support and a safe space in which to hammer out agreements relating to child access and support, division of assets, and anything else that has to be sorted out.
The Benefits of Mediation
The obvious benefits are significant savings in terms of time and money. Court proceedings can drag on for months, and this drives up the cost significantly. Mediation can usually be completed in a matter of weeks, and as a result, costs a lot less.
Other benefits of mediation include:
- Effective Communication Facilitated by a Professional. Ideas, requests, and responses are communicated clearly, in terms that both parties can understand.
- A Mindset of Collaboration. The court system is designed in such a way that the parties are against each other. Mediation is set up to allow the parties to work together. This creates better outcomes, not only for the divorcing couple, but for any children who are involved.
- While court proceedings are public, mediation is a private process.
- Legally Binding. Some people believe a divorce settlement has to go through a court in order to be enforceable, but this is not the case. An agreement reached through mediation is legally enforceable as long as each party certifies that they received independent legal advice.
What Is the Cost?
The answer to this question varies widely from one couple to the next. The cost of mediation depends on many factors, including the following:
- How Complicated is the Divorce? A couple with no children, who have never combined finances and who know what they want to do with the marital home are likely to have their mediation completed quickly, at a relatively low cost. If there is a complex prenuptial agreement to navigate, if there are jointly held assets, or if the couple cannot agree on certain issues, mediation will take longer and cost more.
- Does the Couple Have Minor Children? If so, the divorce settlement has to include agreements relating child custody and/or visitation, child support payments, the provision of health insurance for the child, who will have access to the child’s medical and school records, and more. If either parent contests any of these factors, mediation will cost more.
- What Mediation Method is Being Used? Generally, mediation is a simple case of getting people into the same room to talk. In some cases, though, more progress can be made if the parties are in separate rooms and communicating through the mediator instead of directly with each other. In addition, we have seen a sharp increase in the use of online technology like Zoom, where the discussion is held via video conferencing and the parties only physically meet to sign the paperwork. The method by which the mediation takes place can have a bearing on the cost.
- Which Mediation Specialist are You Using? As with most services, the cost can vary from one provider to the next. Generally, you will pay for more experience or higher levels of specialization.
Is Divorce Mediation for Everyone?
In most cases, divorces can be settled through mediation. However, there are circumstances in which it is not the best option. These include the following:
- One party has been subjected to violence by the other party
- The safety or wellbeing of a minor child is at risk
- Either party fears for their safety
- Either party is experiencing a substance abuse issue or a serious mental illness
- One or both people are unwilling or unable to listen, communicate, and negotiate
Let Us Show You How to Separate Simply
At Separate Simply, we believe that separation and divorce do not have to be traumatic. Instead, they can clear the path to a better future for everyone in the family. We were founded by people who have lived experience of separation; we know first-hand what the challenges are, and we are ready to help you through this challenging time. For more information about our services, contact us today.